I have been requested by Fence Records to remove any of their recordings and have done so.
This includes anything by King Creosote, Pictish Trail, James Yorkston, The Fence Collective & The Skuobhie Dubh Orchestra.
As this leaves me unable to share their wonderful music, please do the good thing -
seek this stuff out. It is music of refreshing honesty and originality.
www.fencerecords.com is a good place to start or the my space site http://www.myspace.com/fencerecords
Sorry guys for any grief caused - if I've missed anything let me know.
Cheers
Hooli
Monday, 30 June 2008
Friday, 27 June 2008
I never understood the frequency uh hu...
Having reached my forties a number years ago and now facing the downhill slope towards senility, hauling firmly at the handbrake of life in a way similar to that employed by Oor Wullie, steaming down the Stoorie Brae with Fat Boab, Wee Eck and Soapy Soutar all on board, I would have expected that I had dealt with all the hardship and woe; all the pain and misery and all the toil and strife that life could throw at me. I figured there could be no more shit thrown at me that I hadn’t already been hit by or dodged.
Oh how wrong I was!
Taking my usual Saturday morning iPod fuelled saunter round my local Tesco while the rest of the family went about their normal business, I was perfectly at peace with the world. Michael Stipe spitting venomous prose in my ears to the backdrop of Peter Buck’s distorted Rickenbacker jangle, my mind wandered to the wonderful video for REMs Bad Day and its glorious pastiche of CNN, CBS and all the other US news channels.
My trolley fully laden with the raw materials for the culinary adventure of the week ahead, I was determined that this trip would not fan the flames of my wife’s usual piss taking about me visiting four supermarkets in a day just to get packet of dried rhino scrotum (or some other equally bizarre item).
Content that I’d got everything, I made my way to the check out.
Being the professional shopper that I am, this is something I’ve got down to fine art and if you too find yourself in this position, I strongly recommend some careful selection as this will see you speeding trough the till and on your way home in under ten minutes.
A few pointers -
1. Never choose a slot with a till operator of more than 50 years – technologically, they’re still struggling to come to terms with the telephone and they haven't a clue what that funny shaped green vegetable is that looks like cucumber that’s met with some witchcraft.
2. Never choose the one that is manned by a spotty kid with his fringe and sides swept all over his face, looking like a reject from his high school Emo band – this is the first time he’s seen daylight since he was eight – the mere thought of conversation with any kind of adult is going to send him spinning into such a state of total disfunctionality that he’s going to totally screw up scanning your goods leaving your bill resembling that of the Royal Regiment of Scotland on home leave.
3. Avoid at all cost the cute little kid who’s just doing this because his parents think they are too posh to let him do a paper round. Other than potatoes and carrots he won’t have a clue what any vegetables are. If you have any alcohol, expect a ten minute delay while he gets authorisation to sell it because he’s only fifteen
4. Avoid the one that is manned by the 45 year old mummy’s boy who looks like the class geek from thirty years ago who’s head you flushed down the lav. Chances are, it is him and he’s going to greet you with embarrassing hugs like you were his long lost greatest best buddy great mate. In the off chance that its not someone from your past, it's most likely that he’s a weirdo on day release from the local nut house and once he’s scanned your Visa card, he’s going to steal your address, your home and your car; abduct your wife and kids to sell them into slavery. Above all that he’s going to steal your identity, then get caught flashing at old ladies and run off, leaving your ID behind where after you will get arrested and sent to a maximum security prison where you'll have to eat gruel and get buggered twice daily for the rest of your life.
5. If you have young kids with you, avoid anyone with any form of facial piercing, any form of visible body art and anyone with any form of abnormality – not because they’ll scare your little toddler but because little toddler will ask all sorts of embarrassing questions.
6. Never, never, ever choose the self-scan till.
This is always f4cked and if it’s not, it’s pretending to be f4cked for the sole reason of pissing off people like you and I.
Picture it – you get there with your two reused bags ready to go – you nod sagely at the dim-witted attendant in charge of all things dim-witted and self-scanny - all you have is an eggbeater and a crate of Coors – piece of piss this technology lark.
You hit button to start scanning and the robot message goes
‘Please scan your first item’
You find the tag with the barcode and zap the eggbeater in front of the scanner – BEEP – egg whisk - £1.25.
You place the beater in your crumpled up recycled bag then… BEEP… ‘Unexpected item in packing area’ goes the demon robot inside the checkout.
You remove the beater and scan it again – BEEP – egg whisk £1.25.
You place the beater back in the crumpled up recycled bag.
You’re just about to scan the Coors when BEEP – 'Unexpected item in packing area'.
You try again – same thing.
Again – same thing.
Aw f4ckit – didn’t want the beater anyway.
You hurl it down to the bottom of the conveyor – BEEP – 'Unidentified item on conveyor - please scan again or press cancel'.
'AAAARRRGH'. You jab furiously at the cancel button.
Finally the machine appears to fall into some sort of repose.
‘Thank f4ck’ you think as you lift the crate of Coors in front of the red light laser zappy thingy.
Nothing. Zilch, Nada, Sweet…F4ck…All.
You move the box back and forth; you move it nearer; you pull further away; you turn it upside down and repeat the process – still nothing.
You think it might be the wrong bar code so, in search of another one, you start to rotate the crate through every possible angle when suddenly, when it’s nowhere near the magic eye… BEEP – Beer £9.99 – you drop the box in disbelief.
At last!
Just as you’re about to lay the crate back on the floor, BEEP – Beer £9.99.
Then again, BEEP – Beer £9.99. BEEP – Beer £9.99. BEEP - Beer £9.99.
By this stage there a mob of irate shoppers built up behind you, all baying for blood – your blood.
The simplest solution is to just take your Beer and go so you push the button to complete the shopping. It’s at this point you realise you have spent half your years savings on 40 eggbeaters and a 100 crates of Coors.
'Aww shit!'
There’s nothing else for it.
You look up and attract the attention of the dormant vehicle for human stupidity, the self-scan checkout attendant.
The only reason this guys here is because his voice scares the normal customers who use the normal checkouts.
He lumbers towards you.
‘YES’ in a very low, loud voice ‘CAN I HELP YOU’
He sounds like Mungo out of Blazing Saddles and your wondering what possible form of help he could offer.
‘This…thing….isn’t…wor…king’ you inform him, talking very slowly and deliberately. ‘I’ve got a bill for 1049 quid and all I’ve got is a crate of beer and a an egg beater’
‘That’s because you kept rescanning. You need to put your items in the bag provided’
‘But I’m using a recycled bag’ you tell him. ‘That’s what you’re people are always telling us to do!’
‘Yes, but you need to put the bag onto the pressure pad or let the attendant know you’re using your own bag, otherwise the machine can’t sense the items’
Suddenly his voice is no longer Mungo it’s more like Margo out of the Good Life – all condescending and patronising and you want to take the eggbeater and set about his silly, floppy, bleached blond fringe and twist it until his smart arsed little head rolls off.
Eventually you get home but you can’t drink the beer because you have a stress headache so you have to go back for some Aspirin.
Trust me – it’s a conspiracy.
7. Finally, and most importantly, at this stage of the proceedings, the person in front of you in the queue has more capacity than anyone on earth to piss upon uyour parade. Check them out carefully. This is especially important if said person is in her mid fifties with a Linda McCartney hairdo mockingly draped around the kind of face that only a mother could love and an arse that looks like Picasso created it. If she has just bought a new vacuum cleaner the size of the empire state building. This is the bitch troll from hell who was in front of me today. This is the excuse for humanity that held me up for half an hour and made me miss my youngest daughter winning a gymnastics medal, all the while making the poor teenage check out girl’s life a misery.
Clearly, in my forty odd years on this earth I’ve been deluding myself.
I know now that my failure to get through the experience without letting something get to was nothing to do with having a bad day.
Nothing to do with Karma. Nothing to do with luck or any of that nonsense.
This woman was clearly a graduate of the National Academy of Annoying Cu^ts.
In addition she was quite obviously a member of a society so secretive that even the Freemasons & the Ancient Order of the Knights Templar are reduced to sharp intakes of breath and fearfully hushed whispers at its very mention.
She was a member of the British Association of Slimeballs, Tossers, Arseholes, Rancid Dirtboxes & Shitehouses (BASTARDS for short).
The type of person who knows she is holding you up, causing you to be late, and takes perverse delight in the fact.
The type of person who gets pre-orgasmically moist at the thought that she might have f4cked you up a little bit.
The type of person with an attitude so unbelievably full of self possessed arrogance, so devoid of any humility or concern for anyone else, that clearly years of schooling and practice must have gone into perfecting it.
The kind of person who drives at 60mph on the straight then slows to 20 on the bends.
Surely they can’t be so naturally annoying.
This must be a skill that has to be worked at.
Surely if they were that bad, their parents would have drowned them at birth.
and so to the music...
REM - Glastonbury http://rapidshare.com/files/125511894/Glastonbury_FM_pt1.rar http://rapidshare.com/files/125518035/Glastonbury_FM_pt2.rar
Oh how wrong I was!
Taking my usual Saturday morning iPod fuelled saunter round my local Tesco while the rest of the family went about their normal business, I was perfectly at peace with the world. Michael Stipe spitting venomous prose in my ears to the backdrop of Peter Buck’s distorted Rickenbacker jangle, my mind wandered to the wonderful video for REMs Bad Day and its glorious pastiche of CNN, CBS and all the other US news channels.
My trolley fully laden with the raw materials for the culinary adventure of the week ahead, I was determined that this trip would not fan the flames of my wife’s usual piss taking about me visiting four supermarkets in a day just to get packet of dried rhino scrotum (or some other equally bizarre item).
Content that I’d got everything, I made my way to the check out.
Being the professional shopper that I am, this is something I’ve got down to fine art and if you too find yourself in this position, I strongly recommend some careful selection as this will see you speeding trough the till and on your way home in under ten minutes.
A few pointers -
1. Never choose a slot with a till operator of more than 50 years – technologically, they’re still struggling to come to terms with the telephone and they haven't a clue what that funny shaped green vegetable is that looks like cucumber that’s met with some witchcraft.
2. Never choose the one that is manned by a spotty kid with his fringe and sides swept all over his face, looking like a reject from his high school Emo band – this is the first time he’s seen daylight since he was eight – the mere thought of conversation with any kind of adult is going to send him spinning into such a state of total disfunctionality that he’s going to totally screw up scanning your goods leaving your bill resembling that of the Royal Regiment of Scotland on home leave.
3. Avoid at all cost the cute little kid who’s just doing this because his parents think they are too posh to let him do a paper round. Other than potatoes and carrots he won’t have a clue what any vegetables are. If you have any alcohol, expect a ten minute delay while he gets authorisation to sell it because he’s only fifteen
4. Avoid the one that is manned by the 45 year old mummy’s boy who looks like the class geek from thirty years ago who’s head you flushed down the lav. Chances are, it is him and he’s going to greet you with embarrassing hugs like you were his long lost greatest best buddy great mate. In the off chance that its not someone from your past, it's most likely that he’s a weirdo on day release from the local nut house and once he’s scanned your Visa card, he’s going to steal your address, your home and your car; abduct your wife and kids to sell them into slavery. Above all that he’s going to steal your identity, then get caught flashing at old ladies and run off, leaving your ID behind where after you will get arrested and sent to a maximum security prison where you'll have to eat gruel and get buggered twice daily for the rest of your life.
5. If you have young kids with you, avoid anyone with any form of facial piercing, any form of visible body art and anyone with any form of abnormality – not because they’ll scare your little toddler but because little toddler will ask all sorts of embarrassing questions.
6. Never, never, ever choose the self-scan till.
This is always f4cked and if it’s not, it’s pretending to be f4cked for the sole reason of pissing off people like you and I.
Picture it – you get there with your two reused bags ready to go – you nod sagely at the dim-witted attendant in charge of all things dim-witted and self-scanny - all you have is an eggbeater and a crate of Coors – piece of piss this technology lark.
You hit button to start scanning and the robot message goes
‘Please scan your first item’
You find the tag with the barcode and zap the eggbeater in front of the scanner – BEEP – egg whisk - £1.25.
You place the beater in your crumpled up recycled bag then… BEEP… ‘Unexpected item in packing area’ goes the demon robot inside the checkout.
You remove the beater and scan it again – BEEP – egg whisk £1.25.
You place the beater back in the crumpled up recycled bag.
You’re just about to scan the Coors when BEEP – 'Unexpected item in packing area'.
You try again – same thing.
Again – same thing.
Aw f4ckit – didn’t want the beater anyway.
You hurl it down to the bottom of the conveyor – BEEP – 'Unidentified item on conveyor - please scan again or press cancel'.
'AAAARRRGH'. You jab furiously at the cancel button.
Finally the machine appears to fall into some sort of repose.
‘Thank f4ck’ you think as you lift the crate of Coors in front of the red light laser zappy thingy.
Nothing. Zilch, Nada, Sweet…F4ck…All.
You move the box back and forth; you move it nearer; you pull further away; you turn it upside down and repeat the process – still nothing.
You think it might be the wrong bar code so, in search of another one, you start to rotate the crate through every possible angle when suddenly, when it’s nowhere near the magic eye… BEEP – Beer £9.99 – you drop the box in disbelief.
At last!
Just as you’re about to lay the crate back on the floor, BEEP – Beer £9.99.
Then again, BEEP – Beer £9.99. BEEP – Beer £9.99. BEEP - Beer £9.99.
By this stage there a mob of irate shoppers built up behind you, all baying for blood – your blood.
The simplest solution is to just take your Beer and go so you push the button to complete the shopping. It’s at this point you realise you have spent half your years savings on 40 eggbeaters and a 100 crates of Coors.
'Aww shit!'
There’s nothing else for it.
You look up and attract the attention of the dormant vehicle for human stupidity, the self-scan checkout attendant.
The only reason this guys here is because his voice scares the normal customers who use the normal checkouts.
He lumbers towards you.
‘YES’ in a very low, loud voice ‘CAN I HELP YOU’
He sounds like Mungo out of Blazing Saddles and your wondering what possible form of help he could offer.
‘This…thing….isn’t…wor…king’ you inform him, talking very slowly and deliberately. ‘I’ve got a bill for 1049 quid and all I’ve got is a crate of beer and a an egg beater’
‘That’s because you kept rescanning. You need to put your items in the bag provided’
‘But I’m using a recycled bag’ you tell him. ‘That’s what you’re people are always telling us to do!’
‘Yes, but you need to put the bag onto the pressure pad or let the attendant know you’re using your own bag, otherwise the machine can’t sense the items’
Suddenly his voice is no longer Mungo it’s more like Margo out of the Good Life – all condescending and patronising and you want to take the eggbeater and set about his silly, floppy, bleached blond fringe and twist it until his smart arsed little head rolls off.
Eventually you get home but you can’t drink the beer because you have a stress headache so you have to go back for some Aspirin.
Trust me – it’s a conspiracy.
7. Finally, and most importantly, at this stage of the proceedings, the person in front of you in the queue has more capacity than anyone on earth to piss upon uyour parade. Check them out carefully. This is especially important if said person is in her mid fifties with a Linda McCartney hairdo mockingly draped around the kind of face that only a mother could love and an arse that looks like Picasso created it. If she has just bought a new vacuum cleaner the size of the empire state building. This is the bitch troll from hell who was in front of me today. This is the excuse for humanity that held me up for half an hour and made me miss my youngest daughter winning a gymnastics medal, all the while making the poor teenage check out girl’s life a misery.
Clearly, in my forty odd years on this earth I’ve been deluding myself.
I know now that my failure to get through the experience without letting something get to was nothing to do with having a bad day.
Nothing to do with Karma. Nothing to do with luck or any of that nonsense.
This woman was clearly a graduate of the National Academy of Annoying Cu^ts.
In addition she was quite obviously a member of a society so secretive that even the Freemasons & the Ancient Order of the Knights Templar are reduced to sharp intakes of breath and fearfully hushed whispers at its very mention.
She was a member of the British Association of Slimeballs, Tossers, Arseholes, Rancid Dirtboxes & Shitehouses (BASTARDS for short).
The type of person who knows she is holding you up, causing you to be late, and takes perverse delight in the fact.
The type of person who gets pre-orgasmically moist at the thought that she might have f4cked you up a little bit.
The type of person with an attitude so unbelievably full of self possessed arrogance, so devoid of any humility or concern for anyone else, that clearly years of schooling and practice must have gone into perfecting it.
The kind of person who drives at 60mph on the straight then slows to 20 on the bends.
Surely they can’t be so naturally annoying.
This must be a skill that has to be worked at.
Surely if they were that bad, their parents would have drowned them at birth.
and so to the music...
REM - Glastonbury http://rapidshare.com/files/125511894/Glastonbury_FM_pt1.rar http://rapidshare.com/files/125518035/Glastonbury_FM_pt2.rar
James King & the Lone Wolves - Texas Lullaby http://rapidshare.com/files/125530782/Texas_Lullaby.rar
Trashcan Sinatras - I've Seen Everything http://rapidshare.com/files/125525301/I_ve_Seen_Everything.rar
Nicky Wire - I Killed The Zeitgeist http://rapidshare.com/files/125521939/I_Killed_The_Zeitgeist.rar
The Accidental - There Were Wolves http://rapidshare.com/files/125505566/There_Were_Wolves.rar
The Blues Band - The Official Bootleg Album http://rapidshare.com/files/125497494/The_Official_Bootleg_Album.rar
Chris Brecht - The Great Ride http://rapidshare.com/files/125487154/The_Great_Ride.rar
Tom Verlaine - Songs And Other Things http://rapidshare.com/files/125481329/Songs_And_Other_Things.rar
Crash Vegas -Red Earth http://rapidshare.com/files/125475553/Red_Earth.rar
Enjoy
Hooli
Friday, 20 June 2008
...swift one to the pecker with my rolled up daily record...
My eldest daughter is the perfect candidate for a career with Greenpace.
A true animal lover in every sense.
Mammals, fish, insects even molluscs all get special treatment.
Me? Although I’ve never been in favour of hurting any living thing, I can take them or leave them.
I’ve always avoided the thorny subject of pets as I get huge guilt trips thrown at me every time it is brought up. Invariably I win, citing various allergies among the excuses for not sharing my life with animals.
The vision of puppykins cocking its leg and pissing into the soundhole of my beloved Takamine is enough to bring out horror sweats.
I remember one time in my teens, driving my mothers Siamese to the vet in a fairly new Ford Capri.
Every time I now see a picture of a Capri the smell of cat’s piss fills my nostrils.
Watching the Bodie & Doyle rolling over the bonnet in the reruns of the Professionals is completely out of the question.
Another time, transporting my brother in law’s cat to Leeds, it proceeded to puke all over the rear of my six month old Vauxhall.
OK so it wasn’t like anything from the Exorcist but a little cat sick goes a long way.
You can see why I have no particular affinity with cars.
When I think about it, as soon as I get a new one, the Gods aren’t satisfied until they have meted out some kind of retribution.
Anyway, back to pets – the simple truth is that pets are expensive.
Once you have one, everything you do from the on has to include considerations for said pet.
We have been fortunate enough to be adopted by a neighbour’s cat. This is fine for me because it gives the kids access to something cute and fluffy without the responsibility. No baskets or cages. No vet bills or insurance. No kennel fees when we go on holiday. Don’t even have to feed it.
I’m told grand parenting is similar…
Much to my childrens delight we have also become custodians to a number of frogs in the pond and I’m now told we might be rabbit sitting for friends when they go on holiday.
It’s going to be interesting to see what the neighbour’s cat and the local foxes make of little bunny.
There is obviously a natural scheme of things there with the main players all capable of having some effect on the food chain.
The trouble nowadays though is that certain species are immune from the whole food chain scenario. They cant even be culled. Everything is becoming protected.
Every year at work we are invaded by swifts.
Nice, cute, fluffy fork tailed little f4ckers that shite all over the place.
While they are here on the northern leg of their migratory pilgrimage, they choose to breed resulting in dozens more tweeting beaks that grow into fork tailed little f4ckers who shite all over the place. So it goes. They continue to breed, come back every year, breed some more, perform their aerobatic shite spreading display, then breed some more before naffing off back to South Africa to shite somewhere else.
Having had to chisel swift crap off a newly ground surface to find out how corrosive bird shit really is, I'd quite happily let them all in, seal up all the windows and doors and gas the little f4ckers.
OK that's not really nature's way.
We are merely the unpaying guest on the planet. Squatters who take everything out and put nothing back. We have no real claim over nature and are probably its greatest enemy but we too have enemies.
Is the swift natures revenge?
No, not really.
Man has a greater foe than the delicate little shitticus forkitailicus.
Surely the work of the Devil, only Satan himself could have conjoured up something so vile, so evil, so stupid yet so f4cking dangerous.
The single most demonic creature upon this earth, more louse riddled than the rat, more sinister than the shark, more despised than the seagull and more disgusting than any of the six legged bity, stingy things that the insect world can throw at us.
The pigeon is pure malevolence incarnate.
Only Old Nick could be responsible for giving us the pigeon.
How else could a creature gain the capacity to breed nine times a year.
With a clutch of two eggs, that means the pigeon population will soar eighteen fold in a single year. Colonisation of the world is surely imminent.
Much of my hatred of the pigeon comes from the fact that I have to carry out building surveys from time to time.
Disused building surveys.
As soon as a pigeon spots that a building is disused, it can zap out the windows with its demonic stare and the colonisation can begin.
If you go into any disused building in this country, norther to central Europe or in the northern and eastern reaches of America, the first thing you will notice is the idiotic burbling cooing sound of roosting pigeons. The next thing that will hit you is the smell. Then, once they realise you are there, they all attempt to make their escape, flapping around like the maniacal psychopaths that they are, crashing into anything in their path including walls windows, you, me and, in the ensuing panic, each other.
One can only assume that this display of apparent suicidal madness is designed to lull silly old homosapien engineer playing at being a surveyor guy into a false sense of security.
Ha ha! Look at the dumb doos flying around like idiots.
Don’t be deceived. The real reason for this is to stir up all their feathery shit dust so to unleash their bio attack.
These guys have more biological and chemical warfare at their disposal than Saddam Hussein ever did yet we still see the blithely ignorant pigeon worshippers in Trafalgar Square feeding them like they were harmless pets.
Once you’ve inhaled the detritus from these messengers of hades, you can expect a good old dose of PFL (Pigeon Fanciers’ Lung) which, put simply, is an allergic reaction to all things pigeony. The mix of their shite and feather fluff induces a similar effect to that experienced by people suffering from asbestosis where the lungs can’t exchange oxygen efficiently enough resulting in shortness of breath. Unlike asbestosis it isn’t necessarily fatal but you can bet they’re working on it. Once they find a way....
Even if you don’t inhale much of their airborne filth you could still contract Parrot Flu or Psitticosis, a type of pneumonia that can actually kill.
If that doesn’t get you then one of the good old bird flu viruses, Ornithosis or Chiamdiosis will. Failing that, there’s always Campolybacter or Shigella both of which, within four hours of contact, will have you shitting through the eye of a needle for a fortnight.
If you’re one of those insanely healthy people who scoff at illness and disease as if it were nothing but a minor inconvenience, consider this, Psitticosis can be passed on…
If they don’t get you they’ll get your kids, your elderly parents, your neighbours or your pets.
Then, as foretold, supremacy will truly be theirs.
Revenge of the dodo’s demise will be complete.
In these days of the super-bug, one final thought…
What do you see hanging around the outside and around the water tanks of hospitals?
The sentinel of death itself - the dreaded doo!
Next time you’re having lunch in the park and you’re about to pull the crust of your sarnie, STOP. Think!
Pull a gun instead.
Dick Dastardly had the right idea.
Dastardly & Muttley in Their Flying Machines
http://rapidshare.com/files/122902041/39_Dastardly___Muttley_in_Their_Flying_Machines.rar
The way of the Vaselines.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122296796/The_way_of_the_Vaselines.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122299598/Vaselines_3.rar
The Big Dish – Swimmer
http://rapidshare.com/files/122293359/Swimmer.rar
Big Country – One In A Million
http://rapidshare.com/files/122289203/One_In_A_Million.rar
The Silent League – Of Stars And Other Somebodies
http://rapidshare.com/files/122285170/Of_Stars_And_Other_Somebodies.rar
James Yorkston – Just Beyond The River
Removed by request
James Yorkston – Fearsome Fairytale Lovers
Removed by request
Fingerprintz – Distinguishing Marks [LP]
http://rapidshare.com/files/122159212/Distinguishing_Marks__LP_.rar
The Big Dish – Creeping Up On Jesus
http://rapidshare.com/files/122282065/Creeping_Up_On_Jesus.rar
Johnny Flynn – A Larum
http://rapidshare.com/files/122277475/A_Larum.rar
The Raphaels – Supernatural
http://rapidshare.com/files/122429637/Supernatural.rar
Echo & The Bunnymen – What Are You Going To Do With Your Life
http://rapidshare.com/files/122325685/What_Are_You_Going_To_Do_With_Your_Life.rar
and so finally, and quite literally following on, the requests...
after weeks of searching,
Echo And The Bunnymen - Reverberation
http://rapidshare.com/files/123799616/Reverberation.rar
St. Vitus Dance - Glypotheque
http://rapidshare.com/files/123792673/Glypotheque.rar
Love And Money - Strange Kind of Love http://rapidshare.com/files/123807329/Strange_Kind_of_Love.rar
More next week....
Tim - James King was a hit but I need to upload it.
Look back next week.
Cheers
Hooli
A true animal lover in every sense.
Mammals, fish, insects even molluscs all get special treatment.
Me? Although I’ve never been in favour of hurting any living thing, I can take them or leave them.
I’ve always avoided the thorny subject of pets as I get huge guilt trips thrown at me every time it is brought up. Invariably I win, citing various allergies among the excuses for not sharing my life with animals.
The vision of puppykins cocking its leg and pissing into the soundhole of my beloved Takamine is enough to bring out horror sweats.
I remember one time in my teens, driving my mothers Siamese to the vet in a fairly new Ford Capri.
Every time I now see a picture of a Capri the smell of cat’s piss fills my nostrils.
Watching the Bodie & Doyle rolling over the bonnet in the reruns of the Professionals is completely out of the question.
Another time, transporting my brother in law’s cat to Leeds, it proceeded to puke all over the rear of my six month old Vauxhall.
OK so it wasn’t like anything from the Exorcist but a little cat sick goes a long way.
You can see why I have no particular affinity with cars.
When I think about it, as soon as I get a new one, the Gods aren’t satisfied until they have meted out some kind of retribution.
Anyway, back to pets – the simple truth is that pets are expensive.
Once you have one, everything you do from the on has to include considerations for said pet.
We have been fortunate enough to be adopted by a neighbour’s cat. This is fine for me because it gives the kids access to something cute and fluffy without the responsibility. No baskets or cages. No vet bills or insurance. No kennel fees when we go on holiday. Don’t even have to feed it.
I’m told grand parenting is similar…
Much to my childrens delight we have also become custodians to a number of frogs in the pond and I’m now told we might be rabbit sitting for friends when they go on holiday.
It’s going to be interesting to see what the neighbour’s cat and the local foxes make of little bunny.
There is obviously a natural scheme of things there with the main players all capable of having some effect on the food chain.
The trouble nowadays though is that certain species are immune from the whole food chain scenario. They cant even be culled. Everything is becoming protected.
Every year at work we are invaded by swifts.
Nice, cute, fluffy fork tailed little f4ckers that shite all over the place.
While they are here on the northern leg of their migratory pilgrimage, they choose to breed resulting in dozens more tweeting beaks that grow into fork tailed little f4ckers who shite all over the place. So it goes. They continue to breed, come back every year, breed some more, perform their aerobatic shite spreading display, then breed some more before naffing off back to South Africa to shite somewhere else.
Having had to chisel swift crap off a newly ground surface to find out how corrosive bird shit really is, I'd quite happily let them all in, seal up all the windows and doors and gas the little f4ckers.
OK that's not really nature's way.
We are merely the unpaying guest on the planet. Squatters who take everything out and put nothing back. We have no real claim over nature and are probably its greatest enemy but we too have enemies.
Is the swift natures revenge?
No, not really.
Man has a greater foe than the delicate little shitticus forkitailicus.
Surely the work of the Devil, only Satan himself could have conjoured up something so vile, so evil, so stupid yet so f4cking dangerous.
The single most demonic creature upon this earth, more louse riddled than the rat, more sinister than the shark, more despised than the seagull and more disgusting than any of the six legged bity, stingy things that the insect world can throw at us.
The pigeon is pure malevolence incarnate.
Only Old Nick could be responsible for giving us the pigeon.
How else could a creature gain the capacity to breed nine times a year.
With a clutch of two eggs, that means the pigeon population will soar eighteen fold in a single year. Colonisation of the world is surely imminent.
Much of my hatred of the pigeon comes from the fact that I have to carry out building surveys from time to time.
Disused building surveys.
As soon as a pigeon spots that a building is disused, it can zap out the windows with its demonic stare and the colonisation can begin.
If you go into any disused building in this country, norther to central Europe or in the northern and eastern reaches of America, the first thing you will notice is the idiotic burbling cooing sound of roosting pigeons. The next thing that will hit you is the smell. Then, once they realise you are there, they all attempt to make their escape, flapping around like the maniacal psychopaths that they are, crashing into anything in their path including walls windows, you, me and, in the ensuing panic, each other.
One can only assume that this display of apparent suicidal madness is designed to lull silly old homosapien engineer playing at being a surveyor guy into a false sense of security.
Ha ha! Look at the dumb doos flying around like idiots.
Don’t be deceived. The real reason for this is to stir up all their feathery shit dust so to unleash their bio attack.
These guys have more biological and chemical warfare at their disposal than Saddam Hussein ever did yet we still see the blithely ignorant pigeon worshippers in Trafalgar Square feeding them like they were harmless pets.
Once you’ve inhaled the detritus from these messengers of hades, you can expect a good old dose of PFL (Pigeon Fanciers’ Lung) which, put simply, is an allergic reaction to all things pigeony. The mix of their shite and feather fluff induces a similar effect to that experienced by people suffering from asbestosis where the lungs can’t exchange oxygen efficiently enough resulting in shortness of breath. Unlike asbestosis it isn’t necessarily fatal but you can bet they’re working on it. Once they find a way....
Even if you don’t inhale much of their airborne filth you could still contract Parrot Flu or Psitticosis, a type of pneumonia that can actually kill.
If that doesn’t get you then one of the good old bird flu viruses, Ornithosis or Chiamdiosis will. Failing that, there’s always Campolybacter or Shigella both of which, within four hours of contact, will have you shitting through the eye of a needle for a fortnight.
If you’re one of those insanely healthy people who scoff at illness and disease as if it were nothing but a minor inconvenience, consider this, Psitticosis can be passed on…
If they don’t get you they’ll get your kids, your elderly parents, your neighbours or your pets.
Then, as foretold, supremacy will truly be theirs.
Revenge of the dodo’s demise will be complete.
In these days of the super-bug, one final thought…
What do you see hanging around the outside and around the water tanks of hospitals?
The sentinel of death itself - the dreaded doo!
Next time you’re having lunch in the park and you’re about to pull the crust of your sarnie, STOP. Think!
Pull a gun instead.
Dick Dastardly had the right idea.
Dastardly & Muttley in Their Flying Machines
http://rapidshare.com/files/122902041/39_Dastardly___Muttley_in_Their_Flying_Machines.rar
The way of the Vaselines.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122296796/The_way_of_the_Vaselines.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122299598/Vaselines_3.rar
The Big Dish – Swimmer
http://rapidshare.com/files/122293359/Swimmer.rar
Big Country – One In A Million
http://rapidshare.com/files/122289203/One_In_A_Million.rar
The Silent League – Of Stars And Other Somebodies
http://rapidshare.com/files/122285170/Of_Stars_And_Other_Somebodies.rar
James Yorkston – Just Beyond The River
Removed by request
James Yorkston – Fearsome Fairytale Lovers
Removed by request
Fingerprintz – Distinguishing Marks [LP]
http://rapidshare.com/files/122159212/Distinguishing_Marks__LP_.rar
The Big Dish – Creeping Up On Jesus
http://rapidshare.com/files/122282065/Creeping_Up_On_Jesus.rar
Johnny Flynn – A Larum
http://rapidshare.com/files/122277475/A_Larum.rar
The Raphaels – Supernatural
http://rapidshare.com/files/122429637/Supernatural.rar
Echo & The Bunnymen – What Are You Going To Do With Your Life
http://rapidshare.com/files/122325685/What_Are_You_Going_To_Do_With_Your_Life.rar
and so finally, and quite literally following on, the requests...
after weeks of searching,
Echo And The Bunnymen - Reverberation
http://rapidshare.com/files/123799616/Reverberation.rar
St. Vitus Dance - Glypotheque
http://rapidshare.com/files/123792673/Glypotheque.rar
Love And Money - Strange Kind of Love http://rapidshare.com/files/123807329/Strange_Kind_of_Love.rar
More next week....
Tim - James King was a hit but I need to upload it.
Look back next week.
Cheers
Hooli
Saturday, 14 June 2008
If I could choose the life I please then I would be a boatman...
With the festival season creeping up on us once more, I’m reminded what a miserable climate we are rewarded with for being UK residents.
As soon as Michael Eavis finishes trimming his beard the clouds begin to gather over the Bristol Channel and the only way left to get to Glasto is by boat.
No wonder we’re a nation of grumpy old f4ckers.
Despite it being the mother and father of all gigs, I have to confess to never actually having been to Glastonbury.
In my younger days, I always planned to go but something invariably got in the way - most likely the issue of the 1500 mile round trip.
Having been to the earlier T in the Park gigs, I always felt a sense of disappointment on the day as the gig, with its abridged sets, murky weather and generally mingin’ surroundings, never really lived up to the expectation.
The Fleadh and others were no different.
Sure, there were memorable moments like the first time my wife and I got together as awkward teenagers to the strains of Gillan and Wishbone Ash at Loch Lomond; or the time, again at Loch Lomond, when Deacon Blue, Runrig and Hothouse Flowers topped a particularly celtic bill, which was followed by a train ride across Rannoch Moor to Fort William and on to Arisaig where we embarked on what became known as ‘the long walk home’ to the east coast.
Yes, there were memorable performances like the time I saw Rory Gallagher near the end of his career, or the first time I saw Michael Marra in a tent on Glasgow Green.
There was the first time I ever came across Kevin McDermott and the last time I ever saw Frankie Miller, again, in a boozy marquee.
There was the time I saw the Pogues with the Chieftains and the buzz was unbelievable – who was going to sing? MacGowan? Strummer? Chevron? Stacey? In the end, from the main stage, the intricacy of the whistle, mandolin, accordion and citterns was so lost that I could have gone up there and played Sally MacLennane out of a bugle up me arse and nobody would have noticed the difference.
Never was a band more suited to a boozy marquee than the Pogues.
More often than not though, it was mismanagement and ego that really screwed things up with the bill toppers (Van Morrison springs immediately to mind - twice) offering up over elaborate and sterile sets.
The fringe performances from the booze tent or the smaller stage provided most of the highlights.
As Britpop and the stadium gig seized the baton in the great relay of musical fashion, the festivals became less interesting to me.
Even recent outdoor gigs and festivals, with only a few exceptions, never really did it for me.
The last time was Tartan Heart a couple of years ago where, despite a bill sporting Aberfeldy, Ricky Ross, The Proclaimers, Michael Marra and The Trashcan Sinatras mixed with some biblical rain, I left swearing I would never go to another festival. That was it, never again.
In spite of that, good old T in the Park was secretly conspiring to make a liar out of me. This year’s line-up, boasting REM & Counting Crows, two of my favourite bands, was a cert, how could I resist. I’d be there, knee deep in mud, dodging the flying pish filled plastic bottles, inwardly smirking at the puking teenagers and trying to avoid going to the toilet for three days. I’d be there but for the fact that I’m on holiday.
Is fate conspiring against me or is it just being my protector? Who knows? Maybe it’s for the best.
David Quantick’s recent piece in Q magazine pretty much puts it all in perspective.
For me, I guess it’s always going to be the small intimate indoor gig, the ‘whites of the eyes’ one that does the trick - like the King Creosote gig I'm off to next week.
Might manage a trip to the Wizard festival as well though…. Supergrass, the Damned, Alabama 3, McCusker / Drever & Woomble and Chris Helme (yes, he of Seahorses fame)… Could be worth the 20 mile trip.
In honour of the festival season, a few live recordings to whet the appetite of those who are brave enough to go.
The Levellers – Best Live - Headlights, White Lines, Black Tar Rivers
http://rapidshare.com/files/122246148/Best_Live__Headlights__White_Lines__Blac.rar
Ricky Ross tracks are all mixed up – running order is as shown on the cover
Ricky Ross - An Evening With Ricky Ross
http://rapidshare.com/files/122333548/An_Evening_With_Ricky_Ross.rar
Big Country – Brighton Rock
http://rapidshare.com/files/122172406/Brighton_Rock.rar
KT Tunstall – Live At The Old Fruitmarket
http://rapidshare.com/files/122251025/Live_At_The_Old_Fruitmarket.rar
World Party – BBC Radio 1 In Concert -1994pt1.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122338375/BBC_Radio_1_In_Concert_-_1994_pt_1.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122343154/BBC_Radio_1_In_Concert_-_1994_pt_2.rar
Kevin McDermott Orchestra – Boxed Set
http://rapidshare.com/files/122348013/Boxed_Set.rar
The Raphaels - Live.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122356143/Live.rar
Neil Finn - Live – Portland 99.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122362459/Live_-_Portland_99.rar
Maria McKee – Live Acoustic Tour 2006
http://rapidshare.com/files/122370245/Live_Acoustic_Tour_2006.rar
Glen Hansard & Margeta Irglova – Live In Washington DC pt 1
http://rapidshare.com/files/122378983/Live_In_Washington_DC_pt_1.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122381896/Live_In_Washington_DC_pt_2.rar
Bright Eyes – New York Town Hall
http://rapidshare.com/files/122396924/New_York_Town_Hall.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122387308/New_York_Town_Hall_2.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122405598/New_York_Town_Hall_3.rar
Hue & Cry – The River Sessions 1987
http://rapidshare.com/files/122412055/The_River_Sessions_1987_Disc_1.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122416665/The_River_Sessions_1987_Disc_2.rar
The Only Ones – The Big Sleep
http://rapidshare.com/files/122423209/The_Big_Sleep.rar
Enjoy
Hooli
As soon as Michael Eavis finishes trimming his beard the clouds begin to gather over the Bristol Channel and the only way left to get to Glasto is by boat.
No wonder we’re a nation of grumpy old f4ckers.
Despite it being the mother and father of all gigs, I have to confess to never actually having been to Glastonbury.
In my younger days, I always planned to go but something invariably got in the way - most likely the issue of the 1500 mile round trip.
Having been to the earlier T in the Park gigs, I always felt a sense of disappointment on the day as the gig, with its abridged sets, murky weather and generally mingin’ surroundings, never really lived up to the expectation.
The Fleadh and others were no different.
Sure, there were memorable moments like the first time my wife and I got together as awkward teenagers to the strains of Gillan and Wishbone Ash at Loch Lomond; or the time, again at Loch Lomond, when Deacon Blue, Runrig and Hothouse Flowers topped a particularly celtic bill, which was followed by a train ride across Rannoch Moor to Fort William and on to Arisaig where we embarked on what became known as ‘the long walk home’ to the east coast.
Yes, there were memorable performances like the time I saw Rory Gallagher near the end of his career, or the first time I saw Michael Marra in a tent on Glasgow Green.
There was the first time I ever came across Kevin McDermott and the last time I ever saw Frankie Miller, again, in a boozy marquee.
There was the time I saw the Pogues with the Chieftains and the buzz was unbelievable – who was going to sing? MacGowan? Strummer? Chevron? Stacey? In the end, from the main stage, the intricacy of the whistle, mandolin, accordion and citterns was so lost that I could have gone up there and played Sally MacLennane out of a bugle up me arse and nobody would have noticed the difference.
Never was a band more suited to a boozy marquee than the Pogues.
More often than not though, it was mismanagement and ego that really screwed things up with the bill toppers (Van Morrison springs immediately to mind - twice) offering up over elaborate and sterile sets.
The fringe performances from the booze tent or the smaller stage provided most of the highlights.
As Britpop and the stadium gig seized the baton in the great relay of musical fashion, the festivals became less interesting to me.
Even recent outdoor gigs and festivals, with only a few exceptions, never really did it for me.
The last time was Tartan Heart a couple of years ago where, despite a bill sporting Aberfeldy, Ricky Ross, The Proclaimers, Michael Marra and The Trashcan Sinatras mixed with some biblical rain, I left swearing I would never go to another festival. That was it, never again.
In spite of that, good old T in the Park was secretly conspiring to make a liar out of me. This year’s line-up, boasting REM & Counting Crows, two of my favourite bands, was a cert, how could I resist. I’d be there, knee deep in mud, dodging the flying pish filled plastic bottles, inwardly smirking at the puking teenagers and trying to avoid going to the toilet for three days. I’d be there but for the fact that I’m on holiday.
Is fate conspiring against me or is it just being my protector? Who knows? Maybe it’s for the best.
David Quantick’s recent piece in Q magazine pretty much puts it all in perspective.
For me, I guess it’s always going to be the small intimate indoor gig, the ‘whites of the eyes’ one that does the trick - like the King Creosote gig I'm off to next week.
Might manage a trip to the Wizard festival as well though…. Supergrass, the Damned, Alabama 3, McCusker / Drever & Woomble and Chris Helme (yes, he of Seahorses fame)… Could be worth the 20 mile trip.
In honour of the festival season, a few live recordings to whet the appetite of those who are brave enough to go.
The Levellers – Best Live - Headlights, White Lines, Black Tar Rivers
http://rapidshare.com/files/122246148/Best_Live__Headlights__White_Lines__Blac.rar
Ricky Ross tracks are all mixed up – running order is as shown on the cover
Ricky Ross - An Evening With Ricky Ross
http://rapidshare.com/files/122333548/An_Evening_With_Ricky_Ross.rar
Big Country – Brighton Rock
http://rapidshare.com/files/122172406/Brighton_Rock.rar
KT Tunstall – Live At The Old Fruitmarket
http://rapidshare.com/files/122251025/Live_At_The_Old_Fruitmarket.rar
World Party – BBC Radio 1 In Concert -1994pt1.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122338375/BBC_Radio_1_In_Concert_-_1994_pt_1.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122343154/BBC_Radio_1_In_Concert_-_1994_pt_2.rar
Kevin McDermott Orchestra – Boxed Set
http://rapidshare.com/files/122348013/Boxed_Set.rar
The Raphaels - Live.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122356143/Live.rar
Neil Finn - Live – Portland 99.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122362459/Live_-_Portland_99.rar
Maria McKee – Live Acoustic Tour 2006
http://rapidshare.com/files/122370245/Live_Acoustic_Tour_2006.rar
Glen Hansard & Margeta Irglova – Live In Washington DC pt 1
http://rapidshare.com/files/122378983/Live_In_Washington_DC_pt_1.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122381896/Live_In_Washington_DC_pt_2.rar
Bright Eyes – New York Town Hall
http://rapidshare.com/files/122396924/New_York_Town_Hall.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122387308/New_York_Town_Hall_2.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122405598/New_York_Town_Hall_3.rar
Hue & Cry – The River Sessions 1987
http://rapidshare.com/files/122412055/The_River_Sessions_1987_Disc_1.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/122416665/The_River_Sessions_1987_Disc_2.rar
The Only Ones – The Big Sleep
http://rapidshare.com/files/122423209/The_Big_Sleep.rar
Enjoy
Hooli
I'd rather hear some truth tonight...
Hitting the headlines a few weeks back were the new Indiana Jones film and the new Sex and the City film.
Quite a contrast.
With interest, I read the comments in my newspaper of choice.
Not really because I was particularly interested. I just like to get my money's worth.
On one hand, we have Harrison Ford, aging gracefully, ripping his pants at the New York premier but keeping his dignity very firmly intact. Talking openly and modestly about the making of the film and complimenting his co-stars; on the other, we have the living embodiment of conceited, spoilt bitchiness, Sarah Jessica Parker, all trussed up in her strapless green creation and silly head decoration, looking for all the world like an escapee from Royal Ascot.
I never got into Sex And The City so maybe it's me being a bit soft, but who exactly is she trying to kid. Either she is being misquoted by the press or she is so far up her own arse that she's talking out of her spleen. Slagging off fellow actresses because they didn't get such great advertising deals or because they get paid less.
For f4ck's sake woman - grow up!!!
This is the kind of shite you hear in primary school playgrounds.
My dad's got a better car than yours!
I've got a better bike than you!
"She get's paid less than me, she must need the money before she's advertising that"
Pure childish bitching.
The fact that she's got a coupon like a welders' bench has nothing to do with the fact she was voted the Unsexiest Woman on the Planet last year, she gets there by a length and a half on personality alone.
Lists again - they mean nothing to me - but obviously she was paying attention.
Despite this, the girlies among us will no doubt be taken in.
In an editorial in the same paper, the writer claimed that "the representation of the characters in Sex And The City cannot be undervalued and that the empowering message of individuality has left a mark on our culture".
I guess she's a fan but she can't honestly expect us to believe that Jeannie fae Torry, Bella oota the Red Road flats or Isa affa the Craigmillar estate are really being culturally affected by her heroines.
What kind of empowering message is being sent to someone who, no matter how hard they try, can't get a job, can't pay the rent, can't feed their kids and , whether its true or not, can't afford either a TV, the licence fee or the bus fare to the nearest cinema.
Empowerment my arse! Sexy my arse!
All of this begs the question, why, if they have nothing useful or sensible to say, do so called celebs feel they have to go to the media and talk so much shite.
Here's some empowered and sexy individuals doing what they do best and letting their music do the talking...
...with a voice that could melt the poles, Natalie Merchant & co...
10000 Maniacs – Campfire Songs – The Popular, Obscure & Unusual Recordings Of 10000 Maniacs
http://rapidshare.com/files/122257712/Campfire_Songs_-_The_Popular__Obscure___Unusual_Recordings_Of_10000_Maniacs.rar http://rapidshare.com/files/122266172/Campfire_Songs_-_The_Popular__Obscure___Unusual_Recordings_Of_10000_Maniacs_2.rar http://rapidshare.com/files/122268766/Campfire_songs__Part_3.rar
...and likewise, Liz Fraser's take on Tim Buckley's 'Song to the Siren' is probably the best ever cover version...
This Mortal Coil - It'll End in Tears
http://rapidshare.com/files/122272805/It_ll_End_in_Tears.rar
A strange one, Joan Osborne. Relish is one of my favourite albums by a female but some of her other stuff, I consider to be a bit hit or miss.
Joan Osborne – Early Recordings
http://rapidshare.com/files/119192888/Joan_Osborne_-_Early_Recordings__1996_.rar
...and doing what Joan Osborne does best, folky-country-americana-soulful-blues...
Alison Moorer - The_Duel.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/119231401/The_Duel.rar
I always thought KT Tunstall was the one, she had all that individuality, good stage presence, great band and also 'the wee bastard'. She could fart in a can and rattle it and it would still have been better that most of her contemporaries.
Now? I'm not so sure.
Think her last album was a bit of a lemon and I didn't take to her live performance here a couple of months back either. Perhaps the attraction was the innocent fragility of it all.
Something from the time when she wasn't to big for her spangly biker boots...
KT Tunstall – Pot Pourri EP
http://rapidshare.com/files/122237006/Pot_Pourri_EP.rar
...and also...
KT Tunstall – Tracks In July
http://rapidshare.com/files/122205725/Tracks_In_July.rar
I wonder if the same could be said of France's First Lady.
This French album, was so full of fragility it almost felt like a crime the first time I heard it.
Her last album, No Promises, carries on in a similar vein. Not sure switching to English was such a good idea though but if anyone had a right to be too big for her boots it's the new Mme. Sarkozy...
Carla Bruni - Quelqu'un m'a dit
http://rapidshare.com/files/122191616/Quelqu_un_m_a_dit.rar
Ooh La La - 60s chic French Style - maybe its just the language that does it.
Françoise Hardy – The Yeh-Yeh Girl From Paris
http://rapidshare.com/files/122209956/The_Yeh-Yeh_Girl_From_Paris.rar
Beautifully folky album from our own Karine Polwart. What more can I say.
Karine Polwart – Scribbled In Chalk
http://rapidshare.com/files/118937189/Scribbled_In_Chalk.rar
finally, someone who reminds me of Alanis Morrisette, big future beckons methinks...
Missy Higgins – Live at the Wireless
http://rapidshare.com/files/122186748/Live_at_the_Wireless.rar
More in a day or two.
Cheers
Hooli
Quite a contrast.
With interest, I read the comments in my newspaper of choice.
Not really because I was particularly interested. I just like to get my money's worth.
On one hand, we have Harrison Ford, aging gracefully, ripping his pants at the New York premier but keeping his dignity very firmly intact. Talking openly and modestly about the making of the film and complimenting his co-stars; on the other, we have the living embodiment of conceited, spoilt bitchiness, Sarah Jessica Parker, all trussed up in her strapless green creation and silly head decoration, looking for all the world like an escapee from Royal Ascot.
I never got into Sex And The City so maybe it's me being a bit soft, but who exactly is she trying to kid. Either she is being misquoted by the press or she is so far up her own arse that she's talking out of her spleen. Slagging off fellow actresses because they didn't get such great advertising deals or because they get paid less.
For f4ck's sake woman - grow up!!!
This is the kind of shite you hear in primary school playgrounds.
My dad's got a better car than yours!
I've got a better bike than you!
"She get's paid less than me, she must need the money before she's advertising that"
Pure childish bitching.
The fact that she's got a coupon like a welders' bench has nothing to do with the fact she was voted the Unsexiest Woman on the Planet last year, she gets there by a length and a half on personality alone.
Lists again - they mean nothing to me - but obviously she was paying attention.
Despite this, the girlies among us will no doubt be taken in.
In an editorial in the same paper, the writer claimed that "the representation of the characters in Sex And The City cannot be undervalued and that the empowering message of individuality has left a mark on our culture".
I guess she's a fan but she can't honestly expect us to believe that Jeannie fae Torry, Bella oota the Red Road flats or Isa affa the Craigmillar estate are really being culturally affected by her heroines.
What kind of empowering message is being sent to someone who, no matter how hard they try, can't get a job, can't pay the rent, can't feed their kids and , whether its true or not, can't afford either a TV, the licence fee or the bus fare to the nearest cinema.
Empowerment my arse! Sexy my arse!
All of this begs the question, why, if they have nothing useful or sensible to say, do so called celebs feel they have to go to the media and talk so much shite.
Here's some empowered and sexy individuals doing what they do best and letting their music do the talking...
...with a voice that could melt the poles, Natalie Merchant & co...
10000 Maniacs – Campfire Songs – The Popular, Obscure & Unusual Recordings Of 10000 Maniacs
http://rapidshare.com/files/122257712/Campfire_Songs_-_The_Popular__Obscure___Unusual_Recordings_Of_10000_Maniacs.rar http://rapidshare.com/files/122266172/Campfire_Songs_-_The_Popular__Obscure___Unusual_Recordings_Of_10000_Maniacs_2.rar http://rapidshare.com/files/122268766/Campfire_songs__Part_3.rar
...and likewise, Liz Fraser's take on Tim Buckley's 'Song to the Siren' is probably the best ever cover version...
This Mortal Coil - It'll End in Tears
http://rapidshare.com/files/122272805/It_ll_End_in_Tears.rar
A strange one, Joan Osborne. Relish is one of my favourite albums by a female but some of her other stuff, I consider to be a bit hit or miss.
Joan Osborne – Early Recordings
http://rapidshare.com/files/119192888/Joan_Osborne_-_Early_Recordings__1996_.rar
...and doing what Joan Osborne does best, folky-country-americana-soulful-blues...
Alison Moorer - The_Duel.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/119231401/The_Duel.rar
I always thought KT Tunstall was the one, she had all that individuality, good stage presence, great band and also 'the wee bastard'. She could fart in a can and rattle it and it would still have been better that most of her contemporaries.
Now? I'm not so sure.
Think her last album was a bit of a lemon and I didn't take to her live performance here a couple of months back either. Perhaps the attraction was the innocent fragility of it all.
Something from the time when she wasn't to big for her spangly biker boots...
KT Tunstall – Pot Pourri EP
http://rapidshare.com/files/122237006/Pot_Pourri_EP.rar
...and also...
KT Tunstall – Tracks In July
http://rapidshare.com/files/122205725/Tracks_In_July.rar
I wonder if the same could be said of France's First Lady.
This French album, was so full of fragility it almost felt like a crime the first time I heard it.
Her last album, No Promises, carries on in a similar vein. Not sure switching to English was such a good idea though but if anyone had a right to be too big for her boots it's the new Mme. Sarkozy...
Carla Bruni - Quelqu'un m'a dit
http://rapidshare.com/files/122191616/Quelqu_un_m_a_dit.rar
Ooh La La - 60s chic French Style - maybe its just the language that does it.
Françoise Hardy – The Yeh-Yeh Girl From Paris
http://rapidshare.com/files/122209956/The_Yeh-Yeh_Girl_From_Paris.rar
Beautifully folky album from our own Karine Polwart. What more can I say.
Karine Polwart – Scribbled In Chalk
http://rapidshare.com/files/118937189/Scribbled_In_Chalk.rar
finally, someone who reminds me of Alanis Morrisette, big future beckons methinks...
Missy Higgins – Live at the Wireless
http://rapidshare.com/files/122186748/Live_at_the_Wireless.rar
More in a day or two.
Cheers
Hooli
Friday, 6 June 2008
I find myself in reverie....
A couple of weeks back, I posted an album by Dead Men Walking.
The subsequent exchange of comments with Smacky and the Mike Peters recording that he kindly upped, reminded me how much I loved the Alarm in their day.
I don't know what it was about them.
They were full of raw energy but then so were a lot of other bands.
They had the sound that saw them challenge U2 and Simple Minds as the country's stadium rock giants but they never quite got there.
They had all the celtic passion of their Scots and Irish counterparts yet they were overlooked.
They weren't as cool or arty as Simple Minds.
They were a poor mans U2.
They were a rock cliche.
They were unfashionable.
Well that's all bollocks.
I saw them live on a couple of occasions and, like Big Country, they could share a bill with anyone and whip the rug out from underneath their feet, sweeping the audience up in an emotional tidal wave.
Yes there may have been a naïvety to their songs but listen to U2 and Simple Minds from the same era. Not exactly free from cringeworthy moments either.
The other day, for the first time in about 15 years, I listened to The Spirit of 76. I actually had to stop the car.
I always liked it but I wasn't prepared for it to choke me the way it did.
The song says everything there is to say about growing up and wanting to break out from small town parochiality; everything about friendships lost; everything about the march of time.
In the album Change there's a timelessness, a fervour and a belief to the songs that is totally uncontrived.
A kind of honesty that rarely surfaces in music.
Sure, the Alarm probably were being pushed and prodded by record company moguls, just as everyone else was but for me, there was something more genuine to their songs.
Mike Peters, in fighting a form of blood cancer for the second time yet still having the passion to go and play live and, sticking to his guns and doing something that requires a special kind of courage and determination, is the living embodiment of what his band was all about.
The fact that the guy is a legend in Welsh music circles yet is so unassuming and humble, is part of what makes the Alarm great.
It's that honesy and humility, conspicuously absent in so many other bands, that shone so brightly in their music twenty odd years ago and still does today.
In a similar vein, I watched the recent re-run of BBC Scotland's Edwyn Collins documentary.
Here is a guy, 25 years on from being at the forefront of the Scottish post punk indie revolution, with such significant influence on the modern art rock of people like Franz Ferdinand yet having constantly swam against the tide of popular opinion throughout his career.
Now, having swum against a different tide, having suffered a double brain haemorrhage, the associated paralysis and the loss of speech, Edwyn's battle to regain fitness and to get back to work is nothing short of extraordinary.
With the material he was working on before his illness released as the album Home Again, he has been back on tour, the culminationon of which will be an appearance at Glastonbury.
Watching the final scenes of the documentary, seeing him live on stage at Dingwalls with his band and his old mate Roddy Frame was a real lump in the throat number.
For someone who was lucky to survive, never mind having to learn to walk, talk, read and write all over again, inspirational is the complete understatement.
Thinking about these guys, a recent blog entry at sunspotmusic.blogspot kind of sums it up.
Quote: "Edwyn Collins battles back from two strokes to perform live. When the only other news about music is who Amy Winehouse punched and which jail Weiland's going to be spending tonight in, it's nice to see actual uplifting music stories. Edwyn Collins had to re-learn all of the songs that he wrote after a severe brain hemorrhage in 2005"
Says it all.
The Alarm - Strength
http://rapidshare.com/files/120450640/Strength.rar
Big Country - The Buffalo Skinners http://rapidshare.com/files/120453238/The_Buffalo_Skinners.rar
The Silencers - The Lyon Tapes
http://rapidshare.com/files/120460022/The_Silencers_-_1989_-_The_Lyon_Tapes_1.rar http://rapidshare.com/files/120464289/The_Silencers_-_1989_-_The_Lyon_Tapes_2.rar
Kevin McDermott - Wise to the Fade http://rapidshare.com/files/120469486/Wise_to_the_Fade.rar
Josef K - Young and stupid
http://rapidshare.com/files/120478861/Young_and_stupid_-_1981.rar
Big Country - BBC Live In Concert
http://rapidshare.com/files/120485603/Big_Country_-_BBC_Live_In_Concert.rar
The Alarm - Declaration
http://rapidshare.com/files/120508045/Declaration.rar
Edwyn Collins - Doctor Syntax
http://rapidshare.com/files/120517677/Doctor_Syntax.rar
The subsequent exchange of comments with Smacky and the Mike Peters recording that he kindly upped, reminded me how much I loved the Alarm in their day.
I don't know what it was about them.
They were full of raw energy but then so were a lot of other bands.
They had the sound that saw them challenge U2 and Simple Minds as the country's stadium rock giants but they never quite got there.
They had all the celtic passion of their Scots and Irish counterparts yet they were overlooked.
They weren't as cool or arty as Simple Minds.
They were a poor mans U2.
They were a rock cliche.
They were unfashionable.
Well that's all bollocks.
I saw them live on a couple of occasions and, like Big Country, they could share a bill with anyone and whip the rug out from underneath their feet, sweeping the audience up in an emotional tidal wave.
Yes there may have been a naïvety to their songs but listen to U2 and Simple Minds from the same era. Not exactly free from cringeworthy moments either.
The other day, for the first time in about 15 years, I listened to The Spirit of 76. I actually had to stop the car.
I always liked it but I wasn't prepared for it to choke me the way it did.
The song says everything there is to say about growing up and wanting to break out from small town parochiality; everything about friendships lost; everything about the march of time.
In the album Change there's a timelessness, a fervour and a belief to the songs that is totally uncontrived.
A kind of honesty that rarely surfaces in music.
Sure, the Alarm probably were being pushed and prodded by record company moguls, just as everyone else was but for me, there was something more genuine to their songs.
Mike Peters, in fighting a form of blood cancer for the second time yet still having the passion to go and play live and, sticking to his guns and doing something that requires a special kind of courage and determination, is the living embodiment of what his band was all about.
The fact that the guy is a legend in Welsh music circles yet is so unassuming and humble, is part of what makes the Alarm great.
It's that honesy and humility, conspicuously absent in so many other bands, that shone so brightly in their music twenty odd years ago and still does today.
In a similar vein, I watched the recent re-run of BBC Scotland's Edwyn Collins documentary.
Here is a guy, 25 years on from being at the forefront of the Scottish post punk indie revolution, with such significant influence on the modern art rock of people like Franz Ferdinand yet having constantly swam against the tide of popular opinion throughout his career.
Now, having swum against a different tide, having suffered a double brain haemorrhage, the associated paralysis and the loss of speech, Edwyn's battle to regain fitness and to get back to work is nothing short of extraordinary.
With the material he was working on before his illness released as the album Home Again, he has been back on tour, the culminationon of which will be an appearance at Glastonbury.
Watching the final scenes of the documentary, seeing him live on stage at Dingwalls with his band and his old mate Roddy Frame was a real lump in the throat number.
For someone who was lucky to survive, never mind having to learn to walk, talk, read and write all over again, inspirational is the complete understatement.
Thinking about these guys, a recent blog entry at sunspotmusic.blogspot kind of sums it up.
Quote: "Edwyn Collins battles back from two strokes to perform live. When the only other news about music is who Amy Winehouse punched and which jail Weiland's going to be spending tonight in, it's nice to see actual uplifting music stories. Edwyn Collins had to re-learn all of the songs that he wrote after a severe brain hemorrhage in 2005"
Says it all.
The Alarm - Strength
http://rapidshare.com/files/120450640/Strength.rar
Big Country - The Buffalo Skinners http://rapidshare.com/files/120453238/The_Buffalo_Skinners.rar
The Silencers - The Lyon Tapes
http://rapidshare.com/files/120460022/The_Silencers_-_1989_-_The_Lyon_Tapes_1.rar http://rapidshare.com/files/120464289/The_Silencers_-_1989_-_The_Lyon_Tapes_2.rar
Kevin McDermott - Wise to the Fade http://rapidshare.com/files/120469486/Wise_to_the_Fade.rar
Josef K - Young and stupid
http://rapidshare.com/files/120478861/Young_and_stupid_-_1981.rar
Big Country - BBC Live In Concert
http://rapidshare.com/files/120485603/Big_Country_-_BBC_Live_In_Concert.rar
The Alarm - Declaration
http://rapidshare.com/files/120508045/Declaration.rar
Edwyn Collins - Doctor Syntax
http://rapidshare.com/files/120517677/Doctor_Syntax.rar
Edwyn Collins - Hellbent On Compromise http://rapidshare.com/files/120524110/Hellbent_On_Compromise.rar
Deacon Blue - Recorded Tonite Aberdeen 21.11.06 http://rapidshare.com/files/120441923/Recorded_Tonite_Aberdeen_21_11_06.rar http://rapidshare.com/files/120445417/Recorded_Tonite_Aberdeen_21_11_06_pt2.rar
The Alarm - In The Poppy Fields http://rapidshare.com/files/120529708/In_The_Poppy_Fields.rar
Del Amitri - Can You Do Me Good http://rapidshare.com/files/120495109/Can_You_Do_Me_Good.rar
Enjoy
Hooli
Wednesday, 4 June 2008
...take away my right to chose, take away my point of view...
I was reading an interesting article on the BBC news website recently that made me think, once again, about language and the way we use, or abuse it.
Mark Easton reported on the campaign by the Independent Asylum Commission to erase the word ‘asylum’ from its modern context.
The Commission chair is quoted in the report as saying "Unless we take action to restore public support and confidence, the outlook for the UK's tradition of providing sanctuary to those fleeing persecution is bleak."
"F4ck me" I thought, "a talking chair"
Misrepresentation of the, so called, asylum seeker has led to some pretty stark sensationalism on the part of the media. It's claimed that such ill informed reports have increased tensions to the point where racial abuse of political refugees is now seen as acceptable behaviour.
Whether you believe that or not, whether you’re a new world humanitarian or a bigoted nationalist, one fact remains inescapable; replacing the word asylum with the word sanctuary, will make not a speck of difference.
I'm certainly not going to be lighting the political touch paper or making any rash claims when I say that whether we call people who, for any particular reason, cannot live in their own country, refugees, asylum seekers, political prisoners, or anything else, it will not have the slightest bearing on how they are treated.
In some parts of Scotland and, dare I say it, England, Ireland and Wales, if you move in from the next village you are considered an outsider. If you move from the town to the country you are an 'incomer'. Even marrying into an insular community will not save you from being tagged a stranger.
The old 'white settler' tag carries as much weight as any racist jibe so to me, choosing a different name is, in itself, just pure lunacy.
Parliament actually replaced the word asylum in 1930 amid claims that lunatic asylum was inappropriate and that ‘hospital’ should be used instead. Given that today, such institutions are still referred to as asylums, loony bins or nut houses - I would say they failed.
However, political correctness does appear to be gaining the upper hand.
Strange isn’t it, the way words get nudged around in the old bally table of modern language.
If we don’t like a particular word we can simply choose a synonym but we need to be careful in case we offend the tender sensibilities of our beloved leaders.
Coming back to the opening statement about the talking chair, ok, this is in fairly common use, but it's clear that language isn't just changing course to suit the current climate, it's being hi-jacked.
I freely admit I am as guilty as anyone else when it comes to misuse of language – my over use of the F word is probably only paralleled by Gordon Ramsay (and possibly the Gallaghers) – but the choice of words in that opening paragraph is from Mr Easton’s report.
I am an engineer working in a factory where the F word is a technical term.
'Sorry mate, your motor's f4cked'
Mark Easton is a journalist, respected as an upholder of truth, working for the BBC.
Why ‘chair’ and not ‘chairman’ or ‘chair person’.
Maybe it's me.
May it actually was a talking Parker Knoll.
Maybe I need a bit less of 'what I can't see I don't believe in'...
...that's another subject for another day.
Whether we like it or not, our language is changing.
So many words or phrases are becoming unacceptable for fear of causing offence.
Take someone of African or Afro-Caribbean origin.
Obviously, there are some strict taboos, but the official term ‘black’ has always puzzled me.
I’ve never come across someone who was actually black, no more than I’ve ever come across someone who was actually white so this leaves the quandary of what to call the black guy or the white guy. Amidst all the political correctness, here’s a novelty, why not just call him by his name.
This runs both ways though, with as many new terms being introduced.
The computer age, with its use of jargon, has changed our language for ever.
Worse than that though, is the teening of our language. Dumbing down to the lowest common denominator. ‘Friends’ syndrome.
I was pleased to see my North East compatriot, Fiona Leith touched on the subject in her newspaper column last weekend. I was beginning to think it was just me.
The total Americanisation of our language has given us terms like, ‘I’m good’, 'and I was like', ‘you’re so fired’, ‘that’s so lame’ and ‘that shirt is so gay’ none of which actually say anything.
As for gangsta and chav speak?
'Just don't even go there'.
OOOOPS!
As well as providing us with a grammatical paradox, these are just plain stupid, yet they creep insidiously into common use.
They may sound like the epitome of cool in an American sitcom or the latest US teen drama but when you transpose them, ‘I’m good’ doesn’t ring the same in a slow Glasgow drawl, or in a lilting Dublin accent any more than ‘you’re so fired’ sounds as effective in Newcastle as ‘ Howay man, yer fookin sackt ye bastaad’.
Hearing, as I do, the range of local accents trying to mimic cafe culture, it does nothing for me at all. I don’t find it attractive in the opposite sex and I certainly don’t find it cool.
Accent and dialect, now that’s a different thing altogether (resisting the urge to say ‘whole different ball game’ there). Accents are wonderful, especially when written, colloquially.
Recently reading one of Irvine Welsh’s books, in which the dialogue was written in the colloquial tongue of east Fife, I was reduced to tears of laughter.
Yes, it was difficult to read but, having an appreciation of the language in that area, I found it nothing short of hilarious.
I’m all for keeping language dynamic but it needs to have some context.
Let’s face it – Fun Boy Three would not have had a hit with ‘The Slightly Unstable Individuals with Challenged Sensibilities Have Taken Over the Hospital for Those Who Are a Threat to Themselves and Society’
And nowww! Laydeez an gennelmennn! Theee momenn you've aawwwl bin waidin fawr! From the miracle that is the personal cohm-pyoo-terrr, as if by magic...
Fun Boy Three - Fame
http://rapidshare.com/files/119260187/Fame.rar
which gives me an excuse to post this great album from Terry Hall...
Colourfield - Virgins And Philistines
http://rapidshare.com/files/119243063/Virgins_And_Philistines.rar
Since we're talking about language, some of our best modern poets...
Linton Kwesi Johnson - Making History & Forces Of Victory
http://rapidshare.com/files/119221016/Making_History.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/120097400/Forces_of_Victory.rar
from the bard of Salford himself...
John Cooper Clarke - Very Best Of John Cooper Clarke & Snap Crackle & Bop
http://rapidshare.com/files/119236571/Very_Best_Of_John_Cooper_Clarke.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/120089471/Snap__Crackle_____Bop.rar
...to the bard of Lochee...
Michael Marra - Silence & Pax Vobiscum ( apologies for the quality - will repost if I get a better recording)
http://rapidshare.com/files/119223481/Silence.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/120116443/Pax_Vobiscum.rar
...and finally the one and only Mr Lovepants...
Ian Dury And The Blockheads - New Boots And Panties
http://rapidshare.com/files/120106680/New_Boots_And_Panties.rar
and the rest, just good tunes...
Eddie & The Hot Rods - Do Anything You Wanna Do
http://rapidshare.com/files/119248239/Do_Anything_You_Wanna_Do.rar
Bob Marley & The Wailers - In Concert
http://rapidshare.com/files/119202412/In_Concert.rar
LAU - Lightweights And Gentlemen
http://rapidshare.com/files/119212760/Lightweights_And_Gentlemen.rar
Luka Bloom - Riverside
http://rapidshare.com/files/119216660/Luka_Bloom_-_Riverside__1990_.rar
Tom Robinson Band - Rising Free
http://rapidshare.com/files/119222474/Rising_Free.rar
Skids - Live - Masquerade Masquerade
http://rapidshare.com/files/119228367/Skids_Live_-_Masquerade_Masquerade.rar
Martin Stephenson & The Daintees - Gladsome, Humour & Blue
http://rapidshare.com/files/120125709/Gladsome__Humour___Blue_1.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/120134883/gladsome_humor_blue_pt_2.rar
Enjoy
Hooli
Mark Easton reported on the campaign by the Independent Asylum Commission to erase the word ‘asylum’ from its modern context.
The Commission chair is quoted in the report as saying "Unless we take action to restore public support and confidence, the outlook for the UK's tradition of providing sanctuary to those fleeing persecution is bleak."
"F4ck me" I thought, "a talking chair"
Misrepresentation of the, so called, asylum seeker has led to some pretty stark sensationalism on the part of the media. It's claimed that such ill informed reports have increased tensions to the point where racial abuse of political refugees is now seen as acceptable behaviour.
Whether you believe that or not, whether you’re a new world humanitarian or a bigoted nationalist, one fact remains inescapable; replacing the word asylum with the word sanctuary, will make not a speck of difference.
I'm certainly not going to be lighting the political touch paper or making any rash claims when I say that whether we call people who, for any particular reason, cannot live in their own country, refugees, asylum seekers, political prisoners, or anything else, it will not have the slightest bearing on how they are treated.
In some parts of Scotland and, dare I say it, England, Ireland and Wales, if you move in from the next village you are considered an outsider. If you move from the town to the country you are an 'incomer'. Even marrying into an insular community will not save you from being tagged a stranger.
The old 'white settler' tag carries as much weight as any racist jibe so to me, choosing a different name is, in itself, just pure lunacy.
Parliament actually replaced the word asylum in 1930 amid claims that lunatic asylum was inappropriate and that ‘hospital’ should be used instead. Given that today, such institutions are still referred to as asylums, loony bins or nut houses - I would say they failed.
However, political correctness does appear to be gaining the upper hand.
Strange isn’t it, the way words get nudged around in the old bally table of modern language.
If we don’t like a particular word we can simply choose a synonym but we need to be careful in case we offend the tender sensibilities of our beloved leaders.
Coming back to the opening statement about the talking chair, ok, this is in fairly common use, but it's clear that language isn't just changing course to suit the current climate, it's being hi-jacked.
I freely admit I am as guilty as anyone else when it comes to misuse of language – my over use of the F word is probably only paralleled by Gordon Ramsay (and possibly the Gallaghers) – but the choice of words in that opening paragraph is from Mr Easton’s report.
I am an engineer working in a factory where the F word is a technical term.
'Sorry mate, your motor's f4cked'
Mark Easton is a journalist, respected as an upholder of truth, working for the BBC.
Why ‘chair’ and not ‘chairman’ or ‘chair person’.
Maybe it's me.
May it actually was a talking Parker Knoll.
Maybe I need a bit less of 'what I can't see I don't believe in'...
...that's another subject for another day.
Whether we like it or not, our language is changing.
So many words or phrases are becoming unacceptable for fear of causing offence.
Take someone of African or Afro-Caribbean origin.
Obviously, there are some strict taboos, but the official term ‘black’ has always puzzled me.
I’ve never come across someone who was actually black, no more than I’ve ever come across someone who was actually white so this leaves the quandary of what to call the black guy or the white guy. Amidst all the political correctness, here’s a novelty, why not just call him by his name.
This runs both ways though, with as many new terms being introduced.
The computer age, with its use of jargon, has changed our language for ever.
Worse than that though, is the teening of our language. Dumbing down to the lowest common denominator. ‘Friends’ syndrome.
I was pleased to see my North East compatriot, Fiona Leith touched on the subject in her newspaper column last weekend. I was beginning to think it was just me.
The total Americanisation of our language has given us terms like, ‘I’m good’, 'and I was like', ‘you’re so fired’, ‘that’s so lame’ and ‘that shirt is so gay’ none of which actually say anything.
As for gangsta and chav speak?
'Just don't even go there'.
OOOOPS!
As well as providing us with a grammatical paradox, these are just plain stupid, yet they creep insidiously into common use.
They may sound like the epitome of cool in an American sitcom or the latest US teen drama but when you transpose them, ‘I’m good’ doesn’t ring the same in a slow Glasgow drawl, or in a lilting Dublin accent any more than ‘you’re so fired’ sounds as effective in Newcastle as ‘ Howay man, yer fookin sackt ye bastaad’.
Hearing, as I do, the range of local accents trying to mimic cafe culture, it does nothing for me at all. I don’t find it attractive in the opposite sex and I certainly don’t find it cool.
Accent and dialect, now that’s a different thing altogether (resisting the urge to say ‘whole different ball game’ there). Accents are wonderful, especially when written, colloquially.
Recently reading one of Irvine Welsh’s books, in which the dialogue was written in the colloquial tongue of east Fife, I was reduced to tears of laughter.
Yes, it was difficult to read but, having an appreciation of the language in that area, I found it nothing short of hilarious.
I’m all for keeping language dynamic but it needs to have some context.
Let’s face it – Fun Boy Three would not have had a hit with ‘The Slightly Unstable Individuals with Challenged Sensibilities Have Taken Over the Hospital for Those Who Are a Threat to Themselves and Society’
And nowww! Laydeez an gennelmennn! Theee momenn you've aawwwl bin waidin fawr! From the miracle that is the personal cohm-pyoo-terrr, as if by magic...
Fun Boy Three - Fame
http://rapidshare.com/files/119260187/Fame.rar
which gives me an excuse to post this great album from Terry Hall...
Colourfield - Virgins And Philistines
http://rapidshare.com/files/119243063/Virgins_And_Philistines.rar
Since we're talking about language, some of our best modern poets...
Linton Kwesi Johnson - Making History & Forces Of Victory
http://rapidshare.com/files/119221016/Making_History.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/120097400/Forces_of_Victory.rar
from the bard of Salford himself...
John Cooper Clarke - Very Best Of John Cooper Clarke & Snap Crackle & Bop
http://rapidshare.com/files/119236571/Very_Best_Of_John_Cooper_Clarke.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/120089471/Snap__Crackle_____Bop.rar
...to the bard of Lochee...
Michael Marra - Silence & Pax Vobiscum ( apologies for the quality - will repost if I get a better recording)
http://rapidshare.com/files/119223481/Silence.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/120116443/Pax_Vobiscum.rar
...and finally the one and only Mr Lovepants...
Ian Dury And The Blockheads - New Boots And Panties
http://rapidshare.com/files/120106680/New_Boots_And_Panties.rar
and the rest, just good tunes...
Eddie & The Hot Rods - Do Anything You Wanna Do
http://rapidshare.com/files/119248239/Do_Anything_You_Wanna_Do.rar
Bob Marley & The Wailers - In Concert
http://rapidshare.com/files/119202412/In_Concert.rar
LAU - Lightweights And Gentlemen
http://rapidshare.com/files/119212760/Lightweights_And_Gentlemen.rar
Luka Bloom - Riverside
http://rapidshare.com/files/119216660/Luka_Bloom_-_Riverside__1990_.rar
Tom Robinson Band - Rising Free
http://rapidshare.com/files/119222474/Rising_Free.rar
Skids - Live - Masquerade Masquerade
http://rapidshare.com/files/119228367/Skids_Live_-_Masquerade_Masquerade.rar
Martin Stephenson & The Daintees - Gladsome, Humour & Blue
http://rapidshare.com/files/120125709/Gladsome__Humour___Blue_1.rar
http://rapidshare.com/files/120134883/gladsome_humor_blue_pt_2.rar
Enjoy
Hooli
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